Stearns Gives “I Have a Dream” Speech
Stearns Gives “I Have a Dream” Speech
It started out like your typical U.N. rant.
Rep. Cliff Stearns (R-FL) was on the House floor, introducing his measure that would withhold 75% of U.S. dues to the United Nations — more than the 50% that Rep. Henry Hyde (R-IL) recommends. Then things got weird (and yes, he said this with a straight face):
I would also say that I had a dream last night. And I had this dream that was of Mr. Hyde, the distinguished chairman of the judiciary committee [ed.- Hyde is the chair of the international relations committee], and in this dream, he was puzzling what to do, as he does in his great wisdom.
As he sat in his chair in this dream, it was a magnificent chair. There were clouds and the harps were all around him, and he was deliberating very carefully whether to do 50 percent or 75 percent. And he finally decided, after much deliberation, to do 50 percent.
But I could tell in this dream that in his heart of hearts, he wanted to have 75 percent. So this dream I had of him convinced me that I should come down to the House floor and offer 75 percent as a humble way to extend his feelings that were in my dream.
With that I want to withhold the balance of my time…
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Absolutely fantastic.
June 17th, 2005 at 3:17 pmThey are all cuckoo bananas. Power is a heady brew that few can handle.
June 17th, 2005 at 3:18 pmToo bad.
I have it on good authority that just last Saturday night Representative Stearns had a dream that the Seniors in his district would be allowed to retire with dignity and our troops would come from Iraq.
If only he had been scheduled to address the floor and introduce legislation on Sunday.
June 17th, 2005 at 3:27 pmHe didn’t see the pink elephants, but they were there, too.
When you sleep, you dream.
When you suffer from dementia, you hallucinate.
June 17th, 2005 at 3:27 pmThis is the standard audition for a cabinet position…..
June 17th, 2005 at 3:32 pmUmmm… is it me, or does anyone else find the homoerotic thread of this dream disturbing??
Henry Hyde in a big ornate chair?
God, he couldn’t have creeped me out any more if he’d bent him over the kitchen table…
Ishkabibble.
June 17th, 2005 at 3:38 pmAll of that lockstepping and strange circular logic is finally twisting their brains … what’s next, a choir of angels?
June 17th, 2005 at 3:46 pmIt was a side effect of all the boner-pills he’s been taking…
June 17th, 2005 at 3:52 pm… Or was it the shark fin soup?
June 17th, 2005 at 3:54 pmHow soon before fellow Floridian J.E.B. Bush tells us that Terri told him in a dream to “follow the path of the missing hour and all will be revealed.” Peggy Noonan can draft the speech.
June 17th, 2005 at 3:59 pmThis is remarkable!
June 17th, 2005 at 4:05 pmThat’s my congressman! I live in Florida’s 6th congressional district. I’m calling Stearn’s offices Monday morning. What an embarrassment.
June 17th, 2005 at 4:09 pmI have a dream that all Neocons vanish in a sweeping fiery vapor, but hey, you don’t hear me talking about it in the U.S. Senate…
June 17th, 2005 at 4:09 pmHe didn’t mention, were they naked in the dream?
June 17th, 2005 at 4:14 pmVery funny! I thought most dreams lasted about 15 seconds! That was quite the drama.
June 17th, 2005 at 4:24 pmps by the look on his face on this article.. he is till scared!
June 17th, 2005 at 4:25 pmCool. Implosions are so cool.
June 17th, 2005 at 4:36 pm“With that I want to withhold the balance of my time…”
Must be a typo. Surely wants to withhold the balance of his “mind” which is in scarce supply, unlike his time, which must be very abundent if he has the time to waste on concocting a moronic show like that. Even his speechwriter’s time (and mind) could be better spent on something.
June 17th, 2005 at 5:27 pmI guess maintaining the conservative fiction about the state of affairs today really does make you lose your mind.
And in my dream, we were all vacationing in Iraq, and we were given flowers by the grateful people, none of whom died horribly painful and greusome deaths. And Henry Hyde was there… and you were there… and you… and you… and Toto too!
June 17th, 2005 at 5:35 pm…and after reaching the house floor, henry hyde was standing there in a red suit with horns and a pitch-fork, surrounded by gargoyles.
June 17th, 2005 at 6:21 pmUh, I know that because of my trusting disposition I can be gulible, so please tell me now if this is a prank.
I mean, if this is real, and congressional representatives are going on record about what they are insinuating to be “divinely inspired” and “revelatory” dreams glorifying themselves and their associates, then the apocolypse is upon us.
Or, this dude is just a certifiable nut-job and his district should be frantically drawing up the papers for a recall election.
P.S. I think I’ll stay away from Florida for a while.
June 17th, 2005 at 6:35 pmStearns should save his energy. In his dreams, Hyde just relives his past “youthful indiscretions.”
June 17th, 2005 at 6:45 pmCan we, the people, withold the balance of his time?
June 17th, 2005 at 8:00 pmWas Hyde included in his sex dreams too?
Remember Hyde is done as his own personal sex scandal has run him out of office.
Stearns and Hyde, what a lovely nasty aids infested disgustiing couple.
Hey Hyde, you’re way behind on your child support payments too, loser!
June 17th, 2005 at 8:12 pmI have no idea who Stearns is but I am all for getting rid of Bush and getting someone in there with some character, like Hillary. She is a real woman’s woman, if you know what I mean.
June 17th, 2005 at 11:41 pmSusan in black type: I don’t know what motivates you, but I am all for you to continue your descent into continued foolishness and mockery.
Do you have a dream, too?
June 18th, 2005 at 12:37 amIt’s Bizarro Susan, agent of the Legion of Doom
June 18th, 2005 at 1:18 amHe’s one of the annointed, just like in many of the bible stories, God talked to him in a dream.
June 18th, 2005 at 8:51 amSo his poor housekeeper had to wash the sticky sheets again that morning.
Florida is one more good argument for global warming. Let’s get on with it.
June 18th, 2005 at 9:03 amWhat’s all the fuss? This is perfectly normal, common, accepted mainstream rw LGFreeper behavior.
Sheesh… you “reality based” crowd have a lot to learn.
(sacrifices chicken!!!)
June 18th, 2005 at 11:55 amSo Buckshot/fake susan is admitting he’s a cross dresser now…
I know a great surgeon if you want something permant done Buckshot..(you would have to stop chugging moonshine for a couple of weeks but hey, it will be worth it)
Also, thank you for your undivided attention..I’m so happy to know that my comments upset the right, afterall that is my goal…
I done using my pink mini skirt if your interested in hand me downs..Call me honey, we’ll talk about your gender identity issues and see if we can’t get you the support you need..
June 18th, 2005 at 12:50 pmI would lilke a little vocabulary help: does English have a word that signifies submission to corruption without suggesting nuttiness?
p.s. These comments comfort me, for they tell me that good people and witty are watching the watchers.
June 18th, 2005 at 3:52 pm…Watching a trainwreck
June 18th, 2005 at 5:49 pmHis dream is our nightmare.
June 18th, 2005 at 6:49 pmDo I hear 76?
Tonight Cliff will be modeling a classic white canvas jacket with extended sleeves that smartly wrap around the back. Italian brown leather straps extend from the sleeves giving that dangerous yet carefree look. The look is complete with matching leather straps and buckels flowing down the front .The jacket is versatile, it can be worn in any season and when buckled one can be carried around like a suitcase or hung up like a duffle bag. Extra padding is optional.
June 18th, 2005 at 7:12 pmOh, I simply agree. Though it does support a”conservative” neckline it should be in style until at least the end of 2008.
June 18th, 2005 at 9:30 pmDarn, I meant sport not support.
June 18th, 2005 at 9:46 pmAnd when he pulled his head from Henry (R-Racist) Hyde’s hairy derriere, Misrepresentative Stearns made the Diebold/Bush cross, and said, “It is coming.” And as it did, he received its plentifulness into his hands. (’That means there was a LOT of it, you see.’ — GWB)
And they piled it in the center of the room, and Republicans wept.
Coming soon to the House of Misreprentatives: curtesy benchside Autoerotic-Autocracy Wipes, for those embarassing moments in rightwing policying.
June 19th, 2005 at 4:00 am“I would lilke a little vocabulary help: does English have a word that signifies submission to corruption without suggesting nuttiness?”
graft2 (gra˘ft) n.
1. Unscrupulous use of one’s position to derive profit or advantages; extortion.
June 19th, 2005 at 4:04 am2. Money or an advantage gained or yielded by unscrupulous means.”
I want some of whatever sleeping pill that guy’s on…
June 19th, 2005 at 12:29 pmThank you, Paul in LA. Anglo-Saxon words do make the obvious clear. I vote for GRAFT as the word to use for 101% of the doings that are doing us in.
June 19th, 2005 at 9:50 pmCAFTA? NAFTA? How about GRAFTA? Could it stick?
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April 3rd, 2006 at 5:42 amThat was an awesome speech
June 5th, 2006 at 10:03 pmEric
What a strange few weeks,do you think Obama can go all the way?
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