Gonzales claims he can’t get a job because of the ‘rough economy.’
Gonzales claims he can’t get a job because of the ‘rough economy.’
In April, reports revealed that former attorney general Alberto Gonzales was “unable to interest law firms in adding his name to their roster.” Gonzales has previously said that law firms were hesitant to hire him because of “all the investigations and the possibility that I might be indicted.” But in an interview with the Austin-American Statesman this week, Gonzales blamed the “rough economy” for his lack of work:
“It’s a rough economy right now, and it’s a tough time for a lot of law firms right now. Obviously they are very careful about bringing on new people, and they are going to be careful about bringing on people where there are questions about things that may have happened in their past,” he said. “Over time, I’m confident those things will be resolved, and things will work themselves out.”
“Greater opportunities,” Gonzales, 53, said, “will present themselves once the stories are out there.”
Later in the interview, Gonzales mentioned that he did have some dream jobs outside of the legal profession. “I’m very fortunate that I’m at a point in my life where if I wanted to do something completely different — be baseball commissioner, for example, I would love a job in baseball, a plug there — I can do it,” said Gonzales.
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I thought it due to his hazy memory problems. No firm wants to hire a bong hitter.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:11 pm“Greater opportunities,” Gonzales, 53, said, “will present themselves once the stories are out there.”
Agreed. He can teach law in the prison library.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:14 pmROTFL! I never thought I’d Ever enjoy something Gonzo had to say, and I’m happy to admit I was wrong! I’d be happy to tell him how he’s screwed up and why he can’t get a job, but he’d forget it immediately afterward. At least he’s done me some good today.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:15 pm12 days and counting till the end of the Worst Presidency Ever!
LET HIM CLEAN TOILETS! (with a toothbrush)
January 8th, 2009 at 4:16 pmI know of a job he’d be superbly qualified for…… Janitor-in-charge-of-toiletsat Alcatraz.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:17 pmRoom and board included.
There is a job in baseball for him. Being part of the grounds crew and rolling out the tarp. If he shows promise, he could be one of the crew that rakes up the infield.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:17 pmGonzales claims he can’t get a job because of the ‘rough economy.’»
– - I’m sure Bush will need someone to do lawn care maintenance at his new digs in Dallas.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:19 pmWhat, the Bush library already has all the liars they need?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:19 pm“I would love a job in baseball,”
He could be a spittoon.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:20 pmHe would say that wouldn’t he?
Gonzo has no integrity, backbone, conscience, morals or intellect; which made him perfect for the Bush administration (hell HE could have been president). The lack of these qualities makes him unsuitable for anything, or anyone, else.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:24 pmCould his inability to find a job as a lawyer have anything to do with the fact that he is complicit in war crimes?
Nah… couldn’t be.. no way…
January 8th, 2009 at 4:24 pmSure and Palin looked like an idiot only because the media was too tough on her. Dumb and in denial, is that what you need to hold office as a Republican?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:24 pmNaw Gonzo, I don’t suppose your inability to find employment has anything to to with you being a hack – a pariah – and an incompetent.
Man, Bushies live in alternate realities. Do you think he’s still proud of being a Bush lackey?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:25 pmDon’t worry Gonzo, being out of work in GWBush’s economy is UNIQUELY AMERICAN! You can always do webcam, and flip burgers, and mow lawns, 3 jobs uniquely american isn’t it! Welcome to the flipside of the American Dream!
January 8th, 2009 at 4:25 pmGolly Fredo, not getting a job has nothing to do with the fact that you’re an incompetence boob, does it? Cry me a river Fredo … cry me a river.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:25 pmI’m amazed!! I thought he already had a couple of deals lined up with Chimpy???
1) Chief Book (4-total number of books) Stacker at the new chimpy liberry at smu, OR
2) Chief Scum Renewer at the pigfarm in crawdad that chimpy now is going to make his new think tank (so to speak)…. the new pond has already been stocked with enough samples so all Fredo has got to do is show up!
January 8th, 2009 at 4:26 pmI would love a job in baseball, a plug there — I can do it
I don’t believe this man is qualified to be a bat boy… who knows, this crooked jerk might steal the bats…
January 8th, 2009 at 4:27 pm“Gonzales claims he can’t get a job because of the ‘rough economy”
It’s hard out there for the GOP pimp. What a bummer. I’m all broken up in tears over Gonzo having a rough time for a
January 8th, 2009 at 4:28 pmJ-O-B. Not worth two nickels to rub with for employment.
Instead of baseball, I think Gonzo might want to consider horse racing. Someone has to clean up the track and he has shown previous experience at shoveling dung.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:29 pmI would love a job in baseball, a plug there — I can do it,”
Me too! I would love to be MVP on a World Series team! A plug here! Is anyone listening? I could hit the winning home run in the 9th inning of the seventh game! Hey! Is this thing on?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:29 pmHe Gonzo — I saw an ad in our local newspaper for an apprentice dog-sh!t scooper upper. Your past work history makes you eminently qualified.
Just saying . . .
January 8th, 2009 at 4:30 pmGonzo just has to wait until after 20 January. Then, hopefully, law firms will have plenty of work. Only he will be paying to hire one of them. And if there is any karma, what ever firm he hires will be as crappy at law as he is.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:32 pmYour joblessness has more to do with your criminal activity for bushco, and your impending conviction and jail time.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:33 pmComing soon: Gonzo the ambulance chaser – and it couldn’t happen to a more-deserving lout.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:33 pmJeez man, that’s rough… he can come work for me, I need more data-entry ops… oh wait, sorry… thanks to the New York State economy, we have a hiring freeze.
Man… if only someone was paying attention to the PEOPLE instead of their POCKETS…
Sorry man, sucks to be you.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:33 pmAny former top government official should be able to find work, no matter the shape of the economy. The whole lot of them screwed up big time and moved on to lucrative posts — why can’t Gonzo?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:34 pmSlip-and-fall lawsuits will be his future.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:34 pmHey Gonzo. If you changed your name and grew a beard, maybe the economy would improve for you. Just a thought.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:34 pmWhat about those 9 openings for U.S, Attorney?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:34 pmGate man for Bush’s Dallas subdivision? Alberto guarded the legal gates for George W. when he should have been applying scales.
The pair of pariahs may have to simmer in their self-made stew for a bit. Throw a little Fran Townsend in for gender seasoning. The whole lot showed their incompetence.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:34 pmI wonder if he remembered what he ate for breakfast this morning.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:36 pmSTARTING JAN 21st FINDING A JOB WILL BE THE LEAST OF YOUR WORRIES.
YOU BETTER RUN SON
January 8th, 2009 at 4:36 pmJust write an honest, tell-all book and you’ll make $$$ Gonzo. Of course, you’ll need to stay away from small airplanes for the rest of your life…
January 8th, 2009 at 4:38 pmThe doofus is going to be disbarred so of course a law firm isn’t going to hire him. Doh. And just exactly why does Gonzo hate baseball commissioners to insult them so? If I were a baseball commissioner, I’d be pissed.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:38 pmThis sure is becoming the week of whiny victim stories:
Tuesday’s child was (M)Ann Coulter
Wednesday’s child was Caribou Barbie and
Thursday’s child is Gonzo, who thinks it is because of the 2nd Republican Great Depression that is denying him gainful employment. I have to wonder how good the economy would have to be for some law firm to want to hire him.
I like barfly’s suggestion: Gonzo the ambulance chaser Sounds like a new reality TV show on FOX.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:40 pmSpeaking of funny…
January 8th, 2009 at 4:40 pm$775 billion: Expected cost of the economic stimulus plan.
$1.2 trillion: Projected federal deficit for 2009.
$30 billion: Annual shortfall to end world hunger.
Political priorities by the numbers. Read more about it on the Borgen Project website (borgenproject.org)
January 8th, 2009 at 4:41 pmActually, it’s kind of disturbing that no other Bush loyalist has ever had a problem being handed a “job” by the corporate cronies who profited off of his administration… except the brown guy.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:43 pmbeing an incompetent twit who probably bought his law degree from a magazine ad has nothing to do with it right?
boo-freakin’ hoo
January 8th, 2009 at 4:43 pmNew definition of irony…when the fit hits the shan, he can defend himself. Very appropriate.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:44 pmWho would have thought that an ex-Attorney General – with both all their connections (and connections are touted as a way to find a job) with the added benefit of being one of a very exclusive small number of people who have qualified for that title……..who would think that even they would have trouble getting a job ?????
So if Gonzo can’t get a job because of the economy, then the economy is really, really, really bad for the working schmuck who is out of a job.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:45 pmWow…I understand that here in Florida law firms, on average, will be reducing their workforce by up to 10% this year so the economy is affecting the legal profession but if you were the Attorney General of the United States and can’t get a job, it’s YOU, man.
I had a job offer at the state attorney’s office rescinded when a member of the city council wasn’t re-elected and needed a job and called in a favor and they were a one-term council member and no one liked her.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:46 pmSomebody needs a Whaaaah Burger and some French Cries.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:49 pmWhy won’t even the conservative thinktanks touch him? I am seriously surprised that there isn’t some firm that defends the indefensible that wouldn’t want a “visionary” like Gonzales.
Is it just that they find him too weak and capitulating?
January 8th, 2009 at 4:49 pmEvery low staff idiot in the Bush Administration found a job even convicted Republican criminals have found jobs. Yet a man who has on his resume that of an Attorney General of the United States of Americans can’t fine a job. Even his best buddy George W. Bush isn’t helping Gonzo after all the stuff he did for Bush/Cheney. Gonzo went so far as the lie under oath and even committ every crimes he was asked to do yet in his hour of need there’s no one there. Gonzo is a disgrace to his race and without an income his wife will quickly leave with what’s left. His children will be so embarrassed they might change their last name. Gonzo will have to ask the Court to appoint him an Attorney for his trial.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:49 pmThe economy must REALLY be in bad shape if gonzo can’t go over to the Heritage Institute for some good ol’ wingnut welfare.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:49 pmAnd we can’t be happier.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:50 pmwhatever happened to “affirmative action” repukeliscums are always whining about? apparently, it doesn’t exist otherwise, Lil Albie woulda had a job by now filling in that quota position.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:50 pmBoo-f**king-hoo.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:54 pmHe still admitted to the bar (for now), why can’t he hang a shingle and do real estate closings and no fault divorces?
Does he think he’s ‘too good’ for that work? Is he drawing unemployment while smoking pot on the couch?
(OMG… i never knew ironically acting like a heartless republican could be so catharticly satisfying. Its like snark-crack)
January 8th, 2009 at 4:57 pmI’m just not seeing it. Imagine your basic conservative law firm, full of white-haired guys drinking scotch all day while charging $800 an hour to have their underlings fill out bailout paperwork for their clients. You think these guys wouldn’t like to have a former AG on their roster? You think they give a crap about dishonesty and flagrant incompetence? Gonzo was loyal to Bush to the end, and that’s all that matters with that crowd.
There’s something else going on here…
January 8th, 2009 at 5:06 pmIsn’t it obvious? No one’s hiring him because he’s…Hispanic.
If he was named Albert Jones, he’d have been snapped up by some GOP stink tank, immediately. Looks like that affirmative action ain’t working for ya, is it, Gonzo?
January 8th, 2009 at 5:10 pmbarfly Says:
Slip-and-fall lawsuits will be his future.
January 8th, 2009 at 4:34 pm
—
LOL. I can see his ads on late night teevee now, in Spanish even….
January 8th, 2009 at 5:15 pm“Greater opportunities,” Gonzales, 53, said, “will present themselves once the stories are out there.”
And what “stories” would those be Gonzo? The stories that you and your ilk are making up about what you weren’t responsible for. You know how you Republicans make up stories so that everything bad that has happened is someone else’ fault.
Gonzo, no one wants to hire you because your are dumber than dirt and are radioactive.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:17 pmFortunately, he’ll get three hots and a cot in jail. There is no need for a job.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:18 pmI can’t recall if I care or not…
January 8th, 2009 at 5:18 pmMaybe he could open a whine and cheeze shop with Sarah Palin and Ann Coulter.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:26 pmI’m not sure I’d want to hire someone with a bad memory.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:30 pmThe economy? That’s not what the people at Safeway told him when he applied for a job as a bagger.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:31 pmPerhaps there will be an opening on the household staff when Shrub moves to Dallas.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:37 pmGonzales claims he can’t get a job because of the ‘rough economy.’
And last week it was because he was a “casualty of the war on terror”.
When in reality, no one wants the taint of a corrupt ex-AG stinking up their law office.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:40 pmI don’t think it was because he was a bad lawyer or a pathetic yes man. I think no law firm will touch him because he got caught. Chicanery is not a reason for not being hired by many law firms but being dumb enough to be caught is.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:44 pmI guess all the law firms have their quotas of lying, incompetent, dooshbags.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:52 pmDon’t forget Cheney was whining this week about being all warm and fuzzy and not the Darth Vader caricature he’s been painted. What a bunch of whining wusses.
January 8th, 2009 at 5:57 pmHerr Boot- Poland, too?
January 8th, 2009 at 6:03 pmHoodathunk Says:
I think no law firm will touch him because he got caught. Chicanery is not a reason for not being hired by many law firms but being dumb enough to be caught is.
Remember the GOP motto: you haven’t been caught if you’re not in jail yet.
IOKIYAR.
January 8th, 2009 at 6:26 pmNah – the economy has nothing to do with it, Gonzo.
No, nobody will hire you because you’re a corrupt, bootlicking little terd with no morals, no ethics and no scruples.
January 8th, 2009 at 6:29 pmLeftside, isn’t that sort of the job description of a lawyer?
January 8th, 2009 at 6:39 pmboth of them…you know who you are.
January 8th, 2009 at 6:39 pmMy apologies to the decent ones
January 8th, 2009 at 6:40 pmPut him in an orange jumpsuit, then he will not worry about finding a job.
January 8th, 2009 at 7:50 pm“I’m very fortunate that I’m at a point in my life where if I wanted to do something completely different — be baseball commissioner, for example, I would love a job in baseball, a plug there — I can do it,” said Gonzales.
What is it with all the Bushites wanting to run sports leagues, anyways? Between him and Condi wanting to run the NFL, it’s getting kind of weird.
January 8th, 2009 at 8:20 pmI love picking on this guy. There is so much ammunition. Here is irony Alberto. The economy is bad because of Bush. But you can’t get a job, because you are not qualified to practice law.
Do something you can do. Join the liars club. It doesn’t pay. But that’s alright. They accept anyone who can lie with a straight face. On second thought the lying is for fun. And you do it for real. They wouldn’t want you either. You are not supposed to believe your own lies. That leaves you out.
January 8th, 2009 at 8:41 pmGONZO HAGUE 2009!!!
January 8th, 2009 at 9:26 pmActually, I could never state it much better then Gonzo. He is merely stating the obvious – he created his own ruin.
January 8th, 2009 at 10:11 pmHe gets a lifetime pension at something like 80% or is it 100%? Does he really need a job? He’s a made guy to quote the Mafia.
January 8th, 2009 at 10:38 pmTwo words: Unemployment Office.
January 8th, 2009 at 11:57 pmRésumé:
Name: Alberto Gonzales
Education: I can’t recall
Previous Employment: I can’t recall
Reason for Leaving: I can’t recall
January 9th, 2009 at 12:11 amOh, and…
Skills: Not being able to recall
January 9th, 2009 at 1:16 amRésumé:
Name: Alberto Gonzales
Education: I can’t recall
Previous Employment: I can’t recall
Reason for Leaving: I can’t recall
Oh, and…
Skills: Not being able to recall
Ha haaa! That might be his problem getting a job right there!
January 9th, 2009 at 1:47 amAlberto Gonzalez is a tragic figure. The Bush Family used him as the fall guy for their unconstitutional antiterrorist policies,(Lee Harvey Oswald famously said he was the “fall guy” or “patsy”).
January 9th, 2009 at 5:10 amNow, he cannot find a job yet, those really responsible for the policies he advocated, (Dick Cheney, John Yoo, etc )are going on to better lives.
Poor Alberto! He did not learn from the lessons of 200 years of slavery.
He became one of the Bush administrations most visual and well known faces and he was totally linked with lies, half truths, unfair and illegal practices, and even torture. That doesn’t leave a warm fuzzy feeling. Those things alone might not keep him out of law, but doing all that ineffectively would. The law will sometimes put up with an immoral crook, but not with an ineffective immoral crook. If I was considering where to take my legal business and found that one of the contenders was the employer of Mr. Gonzalez, I would choose another office. I suspect that law offices across the land are aware of this.
January 9th, 2009 at 7:46 amBaseball Commissioner??!!
Who the eff is he George Costanza?
Gonzo to wife Rebecca, “If the phone rings, answer “Vandalay Industries”.”
Rebecca, “Vanda..what?”
Gonzo, “It might be the unemployment office calling. I gave this number as a business that I applied for a job at.”
Rebecca, “…and you want to be my latex salesman? I don’t think so”
January 9th, 2009 at 8:07 amSeriously though, the only idiot stoopid enough to hire Gonzo in the last 14 years or so was George Bush. Is there anyone out there dumb enough to hire him now with Chimpy’s taint all over him?
January 9th, 2009 at 8:12 amMy thanks to all of you bloggers–best laughs I’ve had in weeks.
As another casualty of bushco politics, I WAS tense because I’ve got a job interview in 2 hours; can’t live on my retirement [professor] income. Now I’ll go in chortling.
Laughter IS the best medicine! Living in a country where so many bright people DO care and DO notice what’s going on around them and DO state their honest feelings is an incredible privilege–in spite of the evils promulgated by bushco and cohorts.
January 9th, 2009 at 12:40 pm