Gonzales inspires students to ‘dream big’ and hope to meet ‘the next George W. Bush’ one day.
Gonzales inspires students to ‘dream big’ and hope to meet ‘the next George W. Bush’ one day.
After months without finding work, former attorney general Alberto Gonzales landed a teaching job at Texas Tech University earlier this year, where he is now leading a political science class on the Executive Branch. When Gonzales’ hiring was announced, Texas Tech chancellor Kent Hance said that the former Bush appointee would “help Texas Tech and ASU prepare our students for success and to be future leaders in the State of Texas and beyond.” In an interview with the Daily Toreador, Gonzales gave an example of some of the inspirational wisdom he is providing to his students:
Gonzales said he wants to encourage Tech students to have high aspirations but to realize that success doesn’t come overnight.
“Dream big but be patient,” he said. “You never know when the next George W. Bush is going to come along and give you a once in a lifetime opportunity like he gave me, but you have to be patient.”
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Ah yes,
What fresh, young undergrad doesn’t dream of one day becoming a disgraced toady with no job prospects?
Thanks Gonzo – you are indeed an inspiration.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:24 pmMeet the next GWB ?
Isn’t it a little early to disillusion them ?
November 30th, 2009 at 1:26 pm[...]where he is now leading a political science class on the Executive Branch
and the class is called “How to ignore the Constitution, skirt the law, and get away with it”
November 30th, 2009 at 1:26 pmGah, he’s an incitement to mediocrity! Fire him quick! Or we’re gonna be hip-deep in impulsive, drunk, slackers.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:26 pmDear God! Just the title sent chills down my spine.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:27 pm“You never know when the next George W. Bush is going to come along…”
Can I just say, I hope for this country and our children and the world in general, the answer is NEVER???
November 30th, 2009 at 1:28 pmIf we ever get another President like Georgie Boy, we’re finished.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:28 pmLearning tip for the Texas Tech students in Gonzo’s class:
Pay close attention, listen intently, take copious notes.
Then, do the exact opposite of what you have been taught.
Seldom in the history of our government has an administration had so many events and decisions absolutely wrong – in their rationale or their outcome.
Learn well – don’t repeat.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:31 pmYou’ll meet the next George W. Bush one sweet day, Alberto….in Hell.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:32 pmI have no problem with encouraging young people (or any people, for that matter) to “dream big”. I also have no problem with advising patience, because big dreams seldom come true overnight.
I think Gonzales would have been better off to leave it at that, though. There are so many more worthy dreams to have than to be a mindless order-taking “yes” man in a corrupt administration.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:33 pmgave you the once in a lifetime opportunity to fail and be removed from your position?
November 30th, 2009 at 1:33 pmAnother tip for the Texas Tech students in Gonzo’s class:
It’s not what you know, but who you know.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:33 pm“…but you have to be patient, and prepared to remove your spine, sell your soul and allow yourself not to recall anything of value.”
November 30th, 2009 at 1:35 pmFrom Matt’s post;
Gonzales said he wants to encourage Tech students to have high aspirations but to realize that success doesn’t come overnight.
“Dream big but be patient,” he said. “You never know when the next George W. Bush is going to come along and give you a once in a lifetime opportunity like he gave me, but you have to be patient.”
That just reminds me of the old vulture cartoon line, “Patience hell, I’m gonna go kill something.”
Well, that’s my advice. Dream big, but make your own opportunity. Don’t wait for some Shrub to come along to give you the chance to facilitate a war-crime. Get out there and be yer own war criminal. Kidnap folks at random off your home-town streets, lock them in your basement, and thump on ‘em now and then. Is this a great country or what?
\snark
November 30th, 2009 at 1:40 pmAh…the next C student with ridiculous family connections who connives and blusters his way into the limelight while his supporters and operatives rig elections to install him in a position he could never possibly be prepared to take on?
Wow!
November 30th, 2009 at 1:41 pmI thought gonzo was fired in disgrace and removed while still in office.
Why is he a mentor for anything?
November 30th, 2009 at 1:41 pm“Dream big but be patient”
~Alberto Gonzalez
Translation: You have to wait for the right opportunity to screw up at a massive scale. Look at George W Bush.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:43 pm“…and don’t sweat the small stuff, like the law and the Constitution—oh, and as long as you didn’t mean to cause your enhanced interrogation victim pain,and as long as he she doesn’t experience organ failure, then you wont see the inside of a jail cell.”
November 30th, 2009 at 1:44 pm@ 12. Perry logan says: Another tip for the Texas Tech students in Gonzo’s class: It’s not what you know, but who you know. November 30th, 2009 at 1:33 pm
Perry, the Revised Standard Version, which I’m sure is applicable to Speedy and the crowd that hung out with the Shrub when he still had Presidential favors to bestow was;
It’s not who you know, it’s who you blow.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:44 pmoooh!
Des this inspiring perspective make Gonzo “a wise Latina”?
November 30th, 2009 at 1:46 pmAs for meeting the next GWB, please Lord, spare us all. One was too fracking many.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:46 pmTexas Tech chancellor Kent Hance said that the former Bush appointee would “help Texas Tech and ASU prepare for the crippling reduction in enrollment that they are about to experience from hiring alberto garbonzo.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:47 pmAlso, take a course in fellatio so that you can please your boss.
By the way the Wikipedia definition contains this sentence, which makes me believe that it fits Alberto even better.
” However, according to the Kama Sutra, fellatio is above all a characteristic of eunuchs (or, according to other translations, of effeminate homosexuals or transwomen similar to the modern Hijra of India), who use their mouths as a substitute for female genitalia.”
November 30th, 2009 at 1:48 pm@ 5th Estate:
No but he balances out;-)
November 30th, 2009 at 1:51 pmCAPTION CONTEST: “Sit, Gonzo! Sit! Good boy! Now go fetch me a beer!“
November 30th, 2009 at 1:51 pmThis comment has been voted down. Click to read.
Was that “opportunity of a lifetime” really worth the sacrifice of your professional ethics, Mr. Gonzales? Is that what you really want the students of Texas Tech to learn from you — that ambition and self-interest are the only worthwhile principles in life???
Neoconservatives make me sick.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:55 pmGonzales said he wants to encourage Tech students to have high aspirations but to realize that success doesn’t come overnight.
“Dream big but be patient,” he said. “You never know when the next George W. Bush is going to come along and give you a once in a lifetime opportunity like he gave me, but you have to be patient.”
It is way too early for April Fool’s jokes.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:56 pmAlberto, you’ll be forever known as the biggest f-up in the Bush Crime Family.
That’s no small accomplishment, given the company you kept.
Apparently, you’re proud of that legacy.
I went from a strip mall lawyer to the Nation’s highest lawyer, and then…
…I got fired.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:57 pmYou never know when the next George W. Bush is going to come along and give you a once in a lifetime opportunity like he gave me, but you have to be patient.
I believe there are 5,130 families that may disagree with this absurd statement.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:05 pmMuckin’ foron!
Fuzzy Slippers, are you a walmart coward?
November 30th, 2009 at 2:06 pmGeorge says – Hehehe, Gonzo, my loyal servant, praises me all the time, he has a statue of me that he worships daily at, little bunches of flowers and cut off fingers of those arab sacrifices, why when he kneels before me and opens his pretty little mouth like a alter boy it makes me all tingly and stuff, you can bet that this GW Bush is gonna give him a once in a lifetime opportunity, well actually, more than once..hehehe. One of these days the world is gonna get another GW Bush in office and Satan will ensure that he finishes the destruction of the entire world. I almost did it, but those damn liberals were on to me from the start and dog gone it if other people started listening to those smarties, they ruined everything, why we were this close to having our rapture…what do you say Dick?
Dick says – Grrrr, Gonzo sure did have a pretty mouth…did you get that fresh blood from cute kittens and puppies for me?
George says – Sure did, crushed their heads with my own two hands, I love having blood on my hands, makes me sleep better.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:06 pmWhy is the troll talking about Chelsea Clinton?
Is she going to agree to invade a country that is no threat to us and remove their leader from the planet, so our oil companies and defense contractors can make a lot of money, to make the neocons happy and be appointed President too?
Oh, and NO MORE BUSHES!!!!!
November 30th, 2009 at 2:07 pmCaption contest:
Shrub, “That’s it Gonzo, stroke it just like that.”
Gozales, “You got it Boss! Condi told me that I won’t smear my lipstick this way…or was it Shit Blossom that told me that? Anyhoo, you’re the Deciderer!”
November 30th, 2009 at 2:07 pmOnce in a lifetime opportunity to do what!?!?! Start two wars, ignore a city under water, make decisions based on his faith, divide a country, send us into a financial tailspin, affectionately call Rove Turd blossom, constantly on vacation, offend other nations, and that’s just for starters…where’s the opportunity here? What a twit….
November 30th, 2009 at 2:08 pmFUZZY SLIPPERS FLAGGED OFF-TOPIC CRAP.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:09 pmcaption:
“Alberto, Jeff Gannon couldn’t make it tody, so make yourself available after the speach.”
November 30th, 2009 at 2:10 pmthe next George W. Bush is going to come along and give you a once in a lifetime opportunity like he gave me,
Yeah, like lying, torturing, murdering and not remembering or recalling doing it…
…if another George Bush comes along, tell him to go to hell.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:10 pmChelsea Clinton graduated from Stanford and got her masters from Oxford. But since she wasn’t a C student she gets disrespected by the rightwingnuts.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:10 pmdream big like gonzo and be a failure when you’re given the opportunity…..funny shit.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:11 pmThe opportunity that George W. Bush gave Gonzales? Well lets see:
Political prosection?
Damage to the Constitution?
Firings of US Attorneys for political reasons?
Politicalization of the Justice Department
Position at 2nd rate University in Lubbock?
Hiring based on Party affiliation rather than competence?
Lying to Congress?
Guess it beats defending drunk driving cases down in South Texas.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:12 pmhttp://current.com/items/91571435_current-under-attack-from-gop-paid-trolls.htm
this link is from Current.com….trolls paid to push right wing talking points on their site…..other sites too?????
November 30th, 2009 at 2:15 pmCaption Contest (Inspired by A Patriot Acting at #34):
Gonzo:
Hey boss. You like me! You really really like me!
Now, can I switch hands? My right arm is awfully fatigued.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:15 pmThis isn’t new or news. We’ve known about it for some time.
They get 25¢ per post.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:21 pmLiberalinaredstate & Fred (I love it when you use the musical notes Fred!),
The last comment in that article in Current sounds familiar:
One way to spot them: They’ll often preface their comments with, “I’ve been a Democrat all my life, but..”, or, “I’m not a Republican, however….”, and proceed to bash President Obama, health care reform, etc.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:28 pmmary lacewing
Yeah, they are always dems but attacking dems…..funny eh?
How do you like my snowman?
November 30th, 2009 at 2:33 pmBeto, man love is not something college grads students need you proseletyzing.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:39 pmFred ♪♫♪ ☃ says:
Your ’snowman’ looks different when I copy/paste it! I was going to make a crude comment about how I’d thought that was a musical note.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:48 pmIsn’t it nice that the Bush Family Criminal Syndicate takes care of their own? I understand that Berto was also offered the post of running the numbers rackets in Dallas, but chose to teach at Texas Tech instead. “I’ve got an image problem,” Berto said, “and being a professor sounds better than running a string of car washes.”
November 30th, 2009 at 2:50 pmNow I’m really confused Fred! When I pasted it onto my reply it looked different – but when it’s been submitted it looks just like yours! How fun. (Much more fun than thinking about the possibility of ANOTHER George W. Bush coming along!)
November 30th, 2009 at 2:50 pmFred @44, boy have I had my head in the sand. I shouldn’t be surprised tho, who pays these trolls? Various right wing groups?
November 30th, 2009 at 2:51 pmYeah, who knows, kids – you might get a good-for-nothing rich kid off on a drunk driving charge and he’ll be your friend for life.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:53 pm☭
卐
☮
☠
•There are lots of them
November 30th, 2009 at 2:56 pmTrouble is, kids, having him as a friend for life, might get you into federal prison.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:56 pmThis is for you, republicanSScareme:
Why the Bush family invaded Iraq
November 30th, 2009 at 2:57 pmFred
November 30th, 2009 at 2:57 pmI thought your symbols were musical notes — they aren’t??
Marie, yes, they are musical notes. Zoom in with your browser. Lower right, where it says 100%.
Each time you click on it the zoom will increase for two or three times and then return to 100%
November 30th, 2009 at 2:59 pmliberalinaredstate@51
November 30th, 2009 at 3:01 pmI think there are lots of right wing organizations that are willing to pay to disrupt any discussion the left might be having.
‘dream big’ and hope to meet ‘the next George W. Bush’ one day.
To do what? Finish the job? Still some working parts of America’s economy that need to be destroyed? Still some small areas in the middle east not scorched? Still people to be tortured.. wires to tap.. ?
Myself.. if I were to meet ‘the next George W. Bush’.. I would have a dilemma.. as a Christian I couldn’t kill the rotten bastard.
November 30th, 2009 at 3:11 pmYeah, George W. Bush… the Peter Principle President; failure on an epic scale.
That’s really something to aspire to, kiddies!! :o|
November 30th, 2009 at 3:25 pm“Dream big but be patient,” he said. “You never know when the next George W. Bush is going to come along…
Whoa! That is not a dream; that’s a nightmare.
November 30th, 2009 at 3:26 pmThis is wrong on multiple levels.
November 30th, 2009 at 3:28 pmAnd how is knowing GWB working out for you now Gonzo?
November 30th, 2009 at 3:41 pmJust when you thought you heard it all….
What planet is Gonzo on????
One surely can’t make this sh!t up…
What’s scary to me is that there are folks that will believe him, too.
November 30th, 2009 at 3:57 pmSo, when you see a fellow underclassmate stumbling down the hall in a drunken stupor, barely able to maintain a C average, think to yourself – this could be a future president of the United States!
November 30th, 2009 at 4:02 pmFunny, Gonzo forgot to mention the importance of blind loyalty and the willingness to commit perjury.
November 30th, 2009 at 4:06 pmWhile you are at it, tell the kids they should play the powerball lottery because there is a 144,000,000 to 1 chance they will win. That will also give them something to dream on.
November 30th, 2009 at 4:06 pmSmart move by Gonzo as the students will be able to visit Bush in jail and even Gonzo will be in a Spanish jail serving his sentence. Nothing like having a corrupt US Attorney General who lies under oath teaching students to do the same.
November 30th, 2009 at 4:31 pmA classic display of the authoritarian personality – you don’t dream of being big. You dream of meeting the right big daddy who will get you in with the big guys.
November 30th, 2009 at 5:16 pmmary lacewing says:
This is for you, republicanSScareme:
Why the Bush family invaded Iraq (see link above)
That’s a good link mary. THanks. I will put it on my website (http://alanfolsom-joethephilosopher.com/joe/joe.html).
The fact is that these rich clowns who run things have no trouble killing people in pursuit of their dog-eat-dog, imperialistic philosophy… which just happens to make them wealthy and powerful at other people’s expense.
They’ve gotten so smart, in fact, that they haven’t noticed the “dumb guys” coming down the street carrying ropes.
November 30th, 2009 at 9:15 pmTracy_5
When asked if his grandparents came here legally, Gonzo replied “that is unclear”.
November 30th, 2009 at 10:39 pmWhat do you think of that Tracy?
he had to get a job in a southern war mongering state.
texas is as good as any in war mongering.
these people that talk of jesus and dont have a clue what jesus message was.
take a trip through texas real friendly but dont let that fool you down deep those people love their wars.
one can only hope they are allowed to leave the union.
they drain the federal budget every year.
they have a real kick butt mentality.
their heroes were the bush’s real selfish family that sold america out to the oil corps.
December 1st, 2009 at 12:29 amMy god, how is it possible Gonzales is teaching and not being questioned about his oath of office?
What are the classes like…
Torture Ethics 101
Advanced Shredding the Constitution
Advanced National Security Letter abuse
How to ignore your oath of office fun and profit
E-Surveillance on a $20 Budget (2 points elective)
What are the graduation degrees?
Masters of Electronic Dictatorship
Associates of WaterBoard Sports Activities
BS of Corruption and Malfeasance
I know, I don’t make any sense, up is down, truth is fib.
Maybe Bernanke can help teach some economics classes too?
December 1st, 2009 at 8:23 amYo, Texans: Your tax dollars at work. I hope you’re proud.
December 1st, 2009 at 8:56 amBush’s pet hippo “gonzo”
December 1st, 2009 at 12:37 pmwill always be faithful and loyal to his criminal master.
He’s always kissing up to the criminal idiot. ‘Thanks to him I’ve lived the American Dream’ Gonzo, you muddy hippo, keep selling yourself cheap. Now get back to your muddy pen!
Only if I could meet him alone in a dark alley
December 4th, 2009 at 5:52 amTracy you are a punk
December 4th, 2009 at 5:53 am