Matt is, of course, correct to note the self-awareness fail that is the Republicans’ decision to psych themselves to cut a lot of social services by watching a) a movie about bank robbery, b) by a director who maxed out to Obama — Affleck spoke up today to note that he thought his recession drama, The Company Men, would be more appropriate viewing for the Republican Caucus. Dave Weigel has some joking suggestions for alternatives. Here are five serious ones:
1. Henry V‘s Saint Crispin’s Day speech is so obvious that I’m almost embarrassed to include it. But it’s an awesome whip speech, whether you’re riding into battle against the French, or telling people what you’ll do to them if they don’t vote with you. I mean, seriously, do you want to have these lines directed at you if you don’t get behind the Boehner plan? “He which hath no stomach to this fight, / Let him depart; his passport shall be made, / And crowns for convoy put into his purse / We would not die in that man’s company / That fears his fellowship to die with us.” Bonus points for insulting the manhood of cowards, dissing the constable of France, and for the debt-ceiling applicable “Come thou no more for ransom, gentle herald: / They shall have none.”:
Or, if you prefer your Shakespearean brutality in straight gangsta mode, go with Exeter rather than Harry:
2. Okay, so, the debt ceiling isn’t the dividing line between the Borg and humanity. But if you’re going to silence doubters, or haters, Captain Picard’s bust-plate-glass-then-take-a-stand move is an awesome formula:
3. It’s unfortunately not available as a clip, but Harry Dean Stanton’s “Credit is a sacred trust, it’s what our free society is founded on,” lecture seems appropriate. Might have to cut it off before the “I don’t want no commies in my car. No Christians either,” line, though.
4. Barack Obama is so totally the Sheriff of Nottingham, what with the taxing, and the employment of deeply unpleasant sorceresses. Allen West can play Azeem if he’s just aching to put a hurt on someone, and help lead the fight against increasing revenue as part of a deal. Also, serves to argue that you don’t have to be a rich industrialist to go Galt:
And of course, if we just watched Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom for advice on raising rapidly approaching ceilings, especially one with spikes, we could solve this mess in a jiffy: