As part of a deal to open a new location in Chicago, fast food giant Chick-Fil-A may have agreed this week to include an LGBT non-discrimination policy for workers and customers, and to stop donating to anti-gay groups. Chick-Fil-A wants to open a second location in the city, but has been met with resistance by the local LGBT community and city officials. Alderman Proco “Joe” Moreno has been trying to broker a deal.

A Chicago LGBT rights organization The Civil Rights Agenda told BuzzFeed Wednesday that as part of negotiations, the foundation responsible for Chick-Fil-A’s giving agreed to stop donating to anti-gay advocacy groups, including two far-right institutions, Focus on the Family and the National Organization for Marriage:

The comments came, the group The Civil Rights Agenda said, in correspondence with a Chicago alderman who had opposed the chain’s expansion to the city.

“The WinShape Foundations is now taking a much closer look at the organizations it considers helping, and in that process will remain true to its stated philosophy of not supporting organizations with political agendas,” the chain is said to have written in a letter to Alderman Proco Moreno. The Chicago group added in a press release: “In meetings the company executives clarified that they will no longer give to anti-gay organizations, such as Focus on the Family and the National Organization for Marriage.”

Oddly, though, neither Focus on the Family nor the National Organization for Marriage are on the list of groups to which WinShape has donated.

In following up for more details, BuzzFeed received a canned response from the company, saying, “We have a 65-year history of providing hospitality for all people and, as a dedicated family business, serving and valuing everyone regardless of their beliefs or opinions.” That line echoes Chick-Fil-A’s Senior Director of Real Estate and its Facebook page, but are in direct contradiction to some of the company’s president, Dan Cathay’s, remarks.

Chicago was at the epicenter of the Chick-Fil-A battle, with its only Chick-Fil-A owner speaking out against the company, and city officials — including Moreno — threatening to stop the store from opening a second location at all.

Students at numerous universities are petitioning their administrations to end their contracts with Chick-fil-A because the company uses its profits to support anti-gay hate groups and ex-gay ministries. In many cases, this would involves evicting the fast food chain from its current place as an on-campus vendor, a significant endeavor. At Davidson College in North Carolina, however, it was a question of whether the college’s Union Board would continue to patronize Chick-fil-A and serve its food at its monthly “After Midnight” events on campus. In response to petition signatures from almost 500 students (over 25 percent of the entire student body),  the Union Board said that it will find alternatives to Chick-fil-A until the full board can convene and make a permanent decision:

In response to the Chick-Fil-A petition we have been presented with,

We reached out to the Union Board members to begin initial conversations but because the board operates on consensus decision-making, a final decision is being put off until we can have face to face conversations and gather more student input. Until a final decision is made, alternative options will be served at After Midnight and other Union Board events. The Davidson College Union Board is firmly committed to building an inclusive community that serves each member of our student body.

Davidson is a private college that maintains a loose affiliation with the Presbyterian Church USA, which began ordaining gay and lesbian clergy last year. The campus maintains a nondiscrimination policy requiring that non-college groups that operate on campus not discriminate based on sexual orientation, protections not included in Chick-fil-A’s own corporate policies.

Over the past few weeks, conservatives have argued that the Chick-fil-A controversy is a question over the company’s right to free speech, as opposed to a concern over the harm caused by president Dan Cathy’s statements and millions of dollars in donations to anti-gay groups. The proof of this effort is now clear to see thanks to conservative online magazine Townhall.com.

Townhall is currently running the ad seen at right, asking internet browsers, “Do you support Chick-fil-A? Vote Now!” A Google contextual ad, it appears all over the web in different sizes and locations, including in the feeds of numerous pro-LGBT blogs. The obvious answer for those who do not want their money supporting anti-gay hate groups and ex-gay ministries is, “No, I do not support Chick-fil-A.”

But when the ad is clicked, the survey question Townhall actually asks is quite different:

Suddenly, the question is not about whether a person supports Chick-fil-A knowing its anti-gay policies, it’s a question about supporting its “freedom of speech and religious expression.” This question is completely irrelevant to the controversy, because nobody is trying to infringe on those freedoms. Indeed, it’s doubtful any freedom-loving American would actually answer “No” to this question, unless of course they were tricked into thinking they were being asked a different question.

Conservatives would prefer not to have a conversation about condemning gay people, criminalizing their behavior, encouraging bullying, or coercing them into harmful, ineffective ex-gay therapy, because those are losing arguments. Instead they spin the issue into one about “biblical values” and basic freedoms. But not only are they trying to play the victim, they’re now trying to trick people into contributing to their self-victimization scheme — values, indeed.

(Click to see full-size.)

This week, a letter has gone viral that a father sent to his son, disowning him because he is gay. Here is its full text:

James,

This is a difficult but necessary letter to write.

I hope your telephone call was not to receive my blessing for the degrading of your lifestyle.

I have fond memories of our times together, but that is all in the past.

Don’t expect any further conversations with me. No communications at all. I will not come to visit, nor do I want you in my house.

You’ve made your choice though wrong it may be. God did not intend for this unnatural lifestyle.

If you choose not to attend my funeral, my friends and family will understand.

Have a good birthday and good life.

No present exchanges will be accepted.

Goodbye,

Dad

The letter was sent five years ago. James, who usually goes by Jamie, had this to offer upon sharing the letter this week:

It’s important to know just what this zealotry from Bryan Fischer, Maggie Gallagher, Dan Cathy, et al., does to everyday people. I’ve never done drugs, was an excellent student, an obedient child (far less trouble than many of my classmates), didn’t drink until I was 22 because it terrified me, and have had just 1 speeding ticket in my life. Yet I am still seemingly deserving of this terrible act of hate and cowardice that one person can place on another.

5 years on and I am still doing fine, though this letter saunters into my mind every once in a while. When it does, I say without hesitation: Fuck you, Dad.

Some might be quick to dismiss this letter as a hoax, but I can assure readers it’s not. In fact, I’m going to break the editorial fourth wall for this post to disclose that I actually know Jamie personally. We were friends in college — in the same degree program, in fact — and I can assure the world that he is very real, and one of the kindest, sweetest, and gentlest people I’ve ever known. Though I haven’t seen him since our last overlapping year of college, I remain connected to him through social media, and vicariously through his partner, fellow blogger Viktor Kerney, who posted about the letter at The Bilerico Project.

I, like many fellow LGBT bloggers and activists, argue daily here at ThinkProgress that the anti-gay rhetoric spewed by conservatives and the actions taken against the LGBT community have serious consequences. Time and attention has been dedicated to the Chick-fil-A controversy, for example, because Dan Cathy’s open condemnation of gay people and his company’s donations to hate groups and ex-gay ministries aren’t just offensive — they harm people. Study after study has shown the impact of family rejection on homelessness, the impact of bullying on depression and suicide, and the impact of societal stigma on the health and economic well-being of LGBT people. Here before you is an example of that harm in its simplest form: a father prioritizing his disdain for homosexuality over his ability to love his own son, his own flesh and blood.

Almost every group opposed to LGBT equality identifies somehow with defending the “family,” either in name or in messaging. But it is the anti-gay rhetoric they profess on behalf of families that actually destroys them. It’s up to those who so proudly turned out for fried chicken last week to defend and justify encouraging such rejection.