Seth Knop, a trans student who played on his high school football team in Michigan.

Numerous conservative groups are concerned about a bill (AB 1266) advancing in the California legislature that would recognize transgender young people’s identities in school, allowing them to use the facilities and play on the sports teams that correspond with their gender identity. Focus on the Family’s resident ex-gay Jeff Johnston lashed out at the bill, claiming that trans identities only exist in a “fantasy reality”:

The reality is that humans are born male or female. At birth we don’t “assign” sex to a child arbitrarily, as the analysis of this bill implies. We recognize the child’s sex – it is a physical reality. But in the world of this bill, that reality doesn’t matter. Like Cinderella in a fantasy world, a person may choose or change his sex, saying, “I can be whatever I want to be.”

But trans identities have nothing to do with who a person “wants to be”; it’s about who a person is. And sometimes, people’s mental understanding of their gender identity does not match the sex of the body they were born into. Denying the reality of their lived experience only serves to shame and stigmatize them, but won’t change their core identity.

Peter LaBarbera of Americans For Truth About Homosexuality, an anti-LGBT hate group, argues that the “idea of socially constructed gender is very radical” and “not safe for the kids,” but there is no evidence to support his aspersions. In fact, the American Psychological Association recommends the passage of nondiscrimination protections like this California bill and any effort to recognize and affirm transgender people. It is that affirmation that best serves their mental well-being, not condemnation and erasure like these conservative groups propose.

Other more conservative states have already implemented similar protections for transgender athletes. Nebraska, for example, quietly implemented such a policy last December, though so far no student has taken advantage of it.

Nicole Maines, right, with her twin brother Jonas and mother Kelly. (Credit: Robert F. Bukaty/ AP)

On Wednesday, the Maine Supreme Judicial Court heard arguments about whether or not a transgender student should be able to use the bathroom appropriate to her gender identity. When Nicole Maines was in fifth grade, she already identified and presented as a girl and was using the girls’ restroom at school. One boy insisted on monitoring her habits and ultimately his grandfather complained about her to the school. The school decided to force her to only use the staff bathroom, which isolated her form her peers and led to her being bullied and ostracized more.

Nicole is now 15 and planning to undergo a physical transition to further find authenticity in her gender identity. The Maine Human Rights Commission supports her family’s case, arguing that the Maine Human Rights Act bars discrimination based on sex.

A Colorado family is seeking the same relief for their six-year-old trans daughter, who was also forced to use either the boys’ room or a staff or nurse’s bathroom.

In both cases, the schools have argued these girls’ gender is irrelevant and that what genitals they have should determine what bathroom they use. Such a perspective erases their identities and opens them up to both ridicule and legitimate safety concerns.

Today, Sen. Tom Harkin (D-IA) released the Strengthening America’s Schools Act of 2013, which is an amendment to the Elementary and Secondary Education Act that includes a variety of reforms designed to make American schools safer and more effective institutions.  The bill has provisions to expand resources and establish guidelines for kindergarten and early childhood education, encourage equity by assessing individual school’s climates and opportunities, and support high quality instruction.

In addition, the bill includes Sen. Al Franken’s (D-MN) Student Non-Discrimination Act, SNDA, which follows the introduction of the bill into the House of Representatives by Rep. Jared Polis (D-CO) and Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (R-FL) in April.  The act is focused on preventing harassment, discrimination, and violence in the public school system targeted at LGBT youth.

SNDA argues that the current state of harassment and violence deprives actual and perceived LGBT students of their right to equal education, in part because discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity is not federally prohibited in public schools.  Thus, the act would add sexual orientation and gender identity to the existing list of federally protected bases of discrimination alongside race, color, sex, religion, disability, and national origin. This measure would allow the federal government to withdraw funding from schools that condoned such discrimination in secondary schools as well as empower students to take legal action against perpetrators of harassment.

SNDA currently has 150 co-sponsors in the House of Representatives, 149 of whom are Democrats.  The sole Republican co-sponsor, Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (FL), has been attacked in the past for pro-equality stances, including her vote for the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell and opposition to the Defense of Marriage Act.

For students across the United States, passage of the Student Non-Discrimination Act is a matter of physical safety.  According to a survey by the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network, 6 out of 10 lesbian, gay, or bisexual students report feeling unsafe at school, with an even higher 8 out of 10 for transgender students. SDNA notes the seriousness of the problem by citing studies and cases in which bullying of LGBT students led to lower grade point averages, absenteeism, health problems, failure to graduate, life-threatening violence, and suicide.

In spite of these grim day-to-day realities for LGBT youth in public schools, Neal McCluskey of the Cato Institute worries that passage of this measure would lead to “a violation of those kids who want to express opposition to LGBT opinions or behavior.”

Sunny Frothingham is an intern with LGBT Progress.

The National Organization for Marriage has sunken to a new low: quibbling with fourth graders. An anonymous fourth grader’s two-paragraph essay defending marriage equality went viral on Reddit last week, prompting Salon contributor Katie McDonough to deem it the “world’s most perfect argument” for the cause. Here’s what the elementary school student wrote (spelling errors and all):

Why gay people should be able to get married is you can’t stop two adult’s from getting married because there grown and it doesn’t matter if it creeps you out just get over it. And you should be happy for them because it’s a big momment in their life. When I went to my grandparents wedding it was the happies momment.

As you can see gay people should have the right to get married and you shouldn’t judge other peoples lives because if you was gay you wouldn’t want people talking about you.

NOM claimed, “we’re not interested in arguing with a fourth-grader,” but nevertheless took exception to McDonough’s characterization:

Proof again that the activists pushing same-sex marriage aren’t interested in reasoned debate and argument: just silencing the other side. A tactic fitting maybe for a schoolyard, but not the public square.

This “Nuh-uh!” response utilizes the exact same tactic it attempts to rebuke — simply disregarding opponents’ points — and ignores the actual merits of the student’s argument. It’s quite true that no ban on same-sex marriage has ever stopped same-sex couples from forming and raising their own families. Certainly, the gay community is not going to suddenly start marrying people of the opposite sex, as the “responsible procreation” argument suggests. Banning same-sex marriage definitely does not have any impact on whether straight men over the age of 55 cheat on their wives, as some conservatives have claimed.

In fact, one of the biggest gaps in NOM’s arguments against equality is the fact that the protections of marriage would greatly benefit these same-sex families. Children raised by same-sex couples fare just as well as other children, and allowing their parents to marry will only add to their protection.

It could very well be that the fourth-grader who wrote this essay actually has same-sex parents. Regardless, there are plenty of nine-year-old’s who do. It’s unclear whether NOM would ever concede that this reality “creeps them out,” but considering that they felt the need to take umbrage to this essay, they certainly don’t seem ready to “get over it.”

This Friday (4/19) is the annual Day of Silence (DoS), when students across the country choose not speak in school in protest of the mistreatment of LGBT youth. While some conservative groups are once again encouraging parents to keep their kids home, Focus on the Family and the Alliance Defending Freedom are hosting their annual pre-buttal, the so-called “Day of Dialogue” (DoD) on Thursday (4/18). The blatant goal of this event is to encourage Christian students to condemn homosexuality and transgenderism to their peers, but under the facade of opposing bullying.

Most of the materials on the DoD page were written by Jeff Johnston, Focus on the Family’s resident ex-gay, who rejects transgender identities as disordered and healthy and who describes homosexuality as “sexual brokenness.” For the Day of Dialogue, he encourages young people to talk about homosexuality with their classmates by suggesting they pursue ex-gay therapy because being gay is the same as being a prostitute or an adulterer:

Without God, and without following His intentions for us, all the good of sexuality is distorted. The good news, in the midst of our sexual brokenness, is that God still loves us deeply. He longs to reconnect with each of us and to begin healing, restoring and transforming us. He invites each of us to respond to His love.

All throughout Scripture, we see that God has a special place in His heart for people who messed up sexually. Jesus’ ancestors included prostitutes and adulterers, and He brought forgiveness and restoration to many people who were caught in sexual brokenness.  In the same way, Jesus is standing with His arms open to each of us. We’ve all had our identity, relationships, sexuality and desires impacted by sin. He invites us to experience new life, forgiveness, true relational intimacy with Him and healthy relationships with others.

As Christians, children of God and followers of Jesus, we have a unique opportunity to offer this good news to our classmates and those around us. In a disordered and hurting world we can offer hope, healing and renewal.

Interestingly, the DoD site does not use the word “gay” or “homosexuality” except on its page, “Responding To Challenges.” Participants are not encouraged to use the words at all, but respond that “God has a plan for our sexuality” (and it’s not homosexuality). Here’s an example of how Focus on the Family encourages students to explain that being gay is a chosen identity:

The fact is that nobody knows how same-sex attractions develop—it appears to be a combination of factors (from biology to individual temperament to culture to environment). There is no proof that it is purely genetic. For more information, you can read Are People Really Born Gay? as well as other resources posted here.

You can explain that the real issue, for those who follow Jesus, is not about changing from “straight” to “gay”, or what kind of sexual identity a person has, but about having a relationship with God. And as our relationship with him grows, we learn to manage our feelings, desires and behavior according to His best plan for us.

The fact is that many people have experienced great changes in their lives and voluntarily chosen  to align their feelings to God’s best plan.

These are blatant falsehoods. The American Psychological Association has determined over decades of research that sexual orientation is innate and attempts to change it are ineffective and harmful. Moreover, the most recent research in a growing field known as epigenetics suggests that sexual orientation is at least partially determined by genes — just not directly. Rather than being coded into the DNA directly, certain sex-specific switches on the genes known as “epi-marks” can be triggered during fetal development, causing variations in hormone levels that determine how the genes will express gender and sexuality for the rest of the individual’s life. It’s still not a perfect explanation, but it’s a clear indicator that biology has a significant impact on determining sex and gender and that they cannot simply be changed by shame-based therapy.

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In February, Spring High School in Texas told student George “Tony” Zamazal that she would not be allowed to wear a dress to prom, even though she feels more comfortable dressing as a woman and identifying with female pronouns. The ACLU intervened on her behalf, and now the school has relented, explaining that Tony could wear a dress so long as she complied with the prom’s dress code as it’s enforced for all female students.

The senior is ecstatic:

TONY: All I wanted was to get to wear a dress to prom, because I wouldn’t have felt comfortable at all showing up in a tux. I’m so grateful that my school has agreed to let me be myself on such an important night.

Respecting people’s identities does not have any major consequence except allowing them to feel safe and authentic.