“They Gave The Stickiness Away”

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"“They Gave The Stickiness Away”"

Sometimes I think we might need to keep abstinence-only sex education around just for the sake of the hilarious analogies. Ann Friedman brings us the news of the comically named Eric Love of the East Texas Abstinence Program. The New York Times explains that he runs a Virginity Rules program (and, indeed, it’s almost as fun as sex) which includes the following delightful analogy:

To make the point, Mr. Love grabbed a tape dispenser and snapped off two fresh pieces. He slapped them to his filing cabinet and the floor; they trapped dirt, lint, a small metal bolt. “Now when it comes time for them to get married, the marriage pulls apart so easily,” he said, trying to unite the grimy strips. “Why? Because they gave the stickiness away.”

By the same token, if gay tape comes to live in your house all the rest of the tape will suddenly lose its adhesive properties. That’s why even though there are gay bars, there’s no such thing as a gay tape shop. Everyone understands that we need to preserve the sanctity of tape.

Photo by Flickr user RileyRoxx used under a Creative Commons license

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